5 CRITICAL THINGS EVERY CHRISTIAN MAN NEEDS TO BE A REAL MAN
Updated: Sep 9, 2020
If you ask any man, or any of his male friends, regardless of their faith, “What do you want more than anything else in life?” His answer won't be "to be a nice guy, to be rich, or even to be handsome." However, his answer will eventually point to “success.” In other words, he wants to win. Yes, some men might say they just want to be “happy,” but do you know any man who wants to be a happy failure? Every man wants to succeed, because every man believes the definition of a real man is associated with success.
Because secretly, every man wants to be a champion…at something. Whether it be in athletics, marriage, parenting, business, at church, or his community, he wants to succeed at whatever he considers worthy of his blood, sweat, and tears. It doesn't matter if he's in law enforcement or a bus driver; on a golf course or in a boardroom, an emotional man or a sophisticated man, every man wants to win!
That’s why such a large number of us (men) are so obsessed with sports;; because we have an insatiable appetite to win at almost everything we do. And if we can’t succeed at something, we’ll at least want to be associated with someone who is successful at it.
Take football for instance. In today's world, a grown man, who’s long past his “glory days” on the gridiron, will buy and wear the jersey of his favorite team, with another man’s name on it, just to satisfy his desire to win. And when the team wins, even though he never made it onto the field, he uses personal phrases like “We won,” “We’re going to the Super Bowl this year,” or “We’re building a dynasty.” And he didn’t throw one pass, make one catch, or score one touchdown.
Even if his team traditionally loses more often than they win (sorry Cleveland Browns fans), he’ll still wear the jersey of the “best player” on the team, because he desperately wants to be associated with that player’s greatness. Think about it, who wants to wear the jersey of the punter or long snapper other than his Mom, wife, and children?
So why do we have such a desire to win, to be successful, and to be associated with greatness? Because most men never get to experience the thrill of standing in the “Winner’s Circle”; hoisting the Vince Lombardi Super Bowl trophy; or being celebrated as the best at what he does.
In fact, he thinks associating with another person’s success is as close as he’ll ever get to experiencing it in his own life. And Christian men aren’t any different. In a Barna Study (2012) of over two thousand Christian men, it revealed the following:
• 8 out of 10 (83%) Christian men are dissatisfied with their jobs
• 6 out of 10 (62%) are struggling financially (i.e., in debt)
• 9 out of 10 of their children walked away from the church after high school
• 5 out of 10 (52%) have experienced or are getting a divorce, and
• 7 out of 10 (78%) admitted to struggling with pornography
Does this sound like success to you? For most men, lifting the “Vince Lombardi Trophy of Life” seems more like a dream than a reality. So instead, many men choose to associate with and live vicariously through the victories and successes of other men.
This fact inspired famous philosopher Henry David Thoreau to write, “The mass of men live lives of quiet desperation.” But I think Thoreau would revise that statement today for Christian men by saying, “Most men are living lives of quiet spiritual frustration.”
But instead of trying to associate ourselves with champions, maybe it’s time we should be asking ourselves, “What does it really take for a Christian man to become a Champion?” Because the truth is, God created you to BE a champion; He built you to win, and purposed you to reign, rule and have dominion (Genesis 1:28), but not at the expense of a family. He expects you to BE a champion in your home, on your job, and in your community; not just to be a fan sitting in the stands or a cheerleader standing on the sidelines applauding men who already are champions.
Even if you never make it to the Super Bowl, World Series, NBA Finals, the Masters, Wimbledon, or the Stanley Cup Finals, you can still be a champion: a successful husband, father, leader, business owner, manager, employee, or even a volunteer. Because before God ever formed you in your mother’s womb, He set you apart for a purpose.
However, there are some non-negotiable, time-tested things you need to have in place in order to succeed as a Christian man. Specifically speaking, there are 5 Important Things You Need to Succeed and Win as a Champion.
In fact, I challenge you to find any successful, spiritually mature, Christian man who doesn’t have at least 4 of these 5 things present in his life. So, let’s take a look at each:
1. You need a SAVIOR who will heal you and restore you.
Every Christian man wants to be the man God called and created him to be and live a life that’s pleasing to God. Ultimately, he doesn’t want to waste his life on pursuing things that don’t matter, “disappoint” God, or be considered a failure or seen as a “hypocrite” when it comes to his faith. Have you ever felt that way?
Your relationship with God is the most important relationship you’ll ever have (Matthew 22:36). Because your relationship with God will ultimately influence and determine the quality of your relationship with others, including your wife/girlfriend, children, friends, neighbors, colleagues, employees, etc.
No Christian man, even if he's a wonderful man, can win a real “championship” outside of an authentic, growing relationship with God. Jesus said without Him, we can do nothing (John 15:5,6). But if you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you’re guaranteed the victory before you even step foot on life’s playing field.
The problem is this: most Christian men were never taught how to cultivate a personal relationship with Christ.This process doesn’t just happen by accident or by checking off another item on your “How to be a good Christian” or "How to avoid being a bad boy" checklist.